Creating Your Life Vision: Beyond the Vision Board Ep. 47

January 17, 2024 by Inspired Together Teachers Leave a Comment

Creating Your Life Vision: Beyond the Vision Board S.4 E. 47

Listen to this episode to learn how to create your life vision and then bring it to reality.

Show notes:

Episode Summary:

Have you ever made a vision board? It’s fun to make a vision board and fun to dream about the things you want to have or to do. But does it work? Today, we’re talking about creating a vision for the life you want to have and how to use visualization to help you stay motivated and remind you to be the person you need to be to get the things you want to have.

In this episode:

The notes below are just a summary of the things we discussed on the podcast. To hear all of the examples and stories we share, be sure to listen to the podcast episode.

It’s the beginning of a new year and that means many of us our thinking about what we want out of the new year. You may have even created a vision board.

For those of you who aren’t familiar with the concept, a vision board is a visual depiction of the things you want to have or do or be in your life. Often it is a physical product, a poster board with pictures pulled out of magazines, or photos and words that describe or show your dreams in a visual way.

Modern day vision boards might also be Pinterest boards, or some other form of electronic collection of pictures.

Making a vision board is all well and good, but does it really help you? Is it worth the time and energy or is it just some big hoax?

Visualizing works, but needs to go beyond the vision board. We’ve got three steps to get you where you want to go.

Step One: Creating a vision for your life.

Do you have a vision for your life? Do you know what you want out of life? Do you know who you want to be?

How are you going to get to wherever you want to be if you don’t know where you’re going? And if you don’t know what you want, how will you know if you’ve gotten it?

If you don’t have a vision for your life, you will drift, reacting to what life gives you, but not choosing it with intention. You are being reactive rather than proactive in your life.

That doesn’t mean you have to have everything all planned out, or that there isn’t room to discover new things along the way. It also doesn’t mean that you won’t change your dreams or rearrange them.

Developing your vision means doing some soul searching. It means really looking within to discover what means the most to you personally. It is a task of clarifying your values.

Your vision is your higher purpose. It is your “why.” When the going gets tough, having a strong vision will keep you motivated. Tt gives you something to work towards and makes your life more meaningful.

The more vividly you can see and feel your vision, the more real it will seem and the harder you will fight for it. If it is compelling to you, you will work to make it come to reality.

You might need to ask yourself questions will help you uncover your vision.

If I could describe my dream day, what would I be doing? Who would I be with? Where would I be?
What kinds of feelings do I want to have in my life?
What do I love to do?
What are the things in my life that are worth fighting for?

Clarify your vision, then make the vision boards. You identify things you want to have or do, what you value and find words that help you feel the way you want to feel.

It’s much more than cutting out pictures of mansions and beach resorts and a million dollars and pasting them on a poster board.

This is designing the life you want to have, or as we often refer to it, living with intention or living an inspired life.

Step 2: Keep your vision in front of you.

This next part is important. You can’t just make a make a vision board and put it up on your wall and at the end of the year you are magically going to get everything you want.

You need to keep your goals in front of you. We are all busy and it is easy for forget our dreams and goals and plans. What is out of sight is often out of mind.

You need to be able to see your vision in detail. It helps to visualize yourself in the scene of wherever you want to be. It needs to feel real and extremely clear. You might recall the emotions, who is around you, and even what you are wearing. You almost need to be able to smell the ocean you want to visit. Seeing your vision regularly keeps your goals in the front of your mind, and the mind works on what you give it.

How do you keep your vision in front of you?

Hang pictures or your vision board on the wall.
Hang pictures, words, or quotes on your bathroom mirror and look at them every time you brush your teeth. You can also draw on your mirrors with dry erase markers.
Turn passwords for computer programs and apps into mini-goal reminders.
Make destiny maps which show a linear sequence, like a timeline of where you want to go.
Turn your visions into affirmations that you say to yourself every day.
Make a habit of daily journaling.

You can call this part manifesting, dreaming, meditating, praying, vision questing or whatever you want, but the point is to keep the focus on what you want. That focus, will help you achieve those things.

You may have heard a famous example of keeping the vision in front of you from actor Jim Carrey. In an interview with Oprah, he shared that when he was a struggling actor, he wrote himself a 10-million-dollar check, “for acting services rendered.” He dated it for ten years in the future. He put that check in his wallet and looked at it every day. Ten years later, he was paid 10 million dollars for the movie Dumb and Dumber.

Step 3 Keep your vision in your head but move with your feet.

You’ve got the vision, and you keep it in front of you. That won’t be enough to get you to where you want to be. What’s next?

You need to take the kinds of actions that will get you to where you want to be.

Jim Carrey did not become a star by looking at a fake check every day. That was just a daily reminder of his dream. He followed with action. He went on casting calls and took small parts in anything he could get. He learned, he practiced, and he kept going after it.

We dreamed of writing a book, and visualized it and talked about it constantly. We talked about what it would look like, and how we would get teachers involved and capture their ideas. Our book didn’t just appear, we had to put in the work to make it happen. Today, our book is a guided journal for teachers, that will help teachers stay mindful and intentional. The Inspired Teachers Journal: A Weekly Guide to Becoming Your Best Self is available on Amazon here.

You have to do the work.

Sometimes that means that you have to become someone who is different. You have to become a person who runs regularly in order to run a marathon.

Most elite athletes are highly trained in visualizing. But they also have to become an athlete who can achieve at the highest levels. That means practice, and repetition on a daily basis, being conscious of what they eat, changing their mindsets, and many other things. Before they can achieve their Olympic medals, they have to become a person who has the skills that will allow them to win those medals.

Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps created mental images videos in his mind. He visualized himself winning the medal in great detail and replayed it every day. Emily Cook, an American free style skier created audio visualizations that she listened to every day. She harnessed the same power of listening to her visions every day. Both of these athletes created detailed visions for what they wanted in life, but they also took the steps needed in order to be able to have the skills they needed to make their vision come true. They designed their vision and then moved their feet.

Visualization Research

There is plenty of scientific research to show that visualization works.

According to Neuroscientist Dr. Amy Palmer, mentally rehearsing and imagining movements shares the same brain mechanism as actually doing the same movements. The brain has the same activity when it visualizes doing an action as it does when it is physically performing the action.

Our brain’s Reticular Activation System, or RAS, is a bundle of neurons that have several functions. One of those functions is as a gate keeper, helping us filter out unnecessary stimuli and letting in important information that we need to survive and thrive. There is so much stimulus in the world that we can’t possibly attend to it, it would completely overwhelm us. Our brain protects us by filtering out the less useful things and focusing on the important things. Visualization helps your RAS know what is important, and to let that information stay in the forefront of your conscious awareness.

Visualization helps you to become the person you need to be in order to get the things you want to have.

Who do you need to become in order to get the things you want to have?

This is where it is easy to quit. The task might seem too large or too impossible.

But you won’t know until you move your feet. Take one small action and then another one. Make it a habit. Then add another habit. When that gets easy, up your game.

This is where your goals come in. People often start with making goals, but you should first create the vision. We talked about this in our last episode, What’s Stopping You From Reaching Your Goals? You need clear specific goals, that are challenging, but not too challenging. You break them down into bite sized pieces and schedule them into your day. You find support and then you keep going.

We leave you with today’s quote from futurist Joel Arthur Barker:

“Vision without action is merely a dream. Action without vision just passes the time.”

Recap:

Visualizing is a great tool to help you achieve your dreams and goals, but making a vision board is not enough. You have to first create a deep, compelling vision of what you really want. Then you need to keep that vision in front of you on a regular basis. And lastly, your need to take action. You need to become the type of person you need to become in order to achieve your dreams. With focus and consistency, you can create and achieve many smaller goals that will lead you to your big dreams.

Quote:

“Vision without action is merely a dream. Action without vision just passes the time.”

Joel Arthur Barker

Resources mentioned in this episode:

The Neuroscience of Visualization

The Inspired Teacher’s Journal: A Weekly Guide to Your Best Self

Note: if you buy the book through our link, we will recieve a small percentage of the price at no additional cost to you.

Related Episodes/Blog Posts:

Inspired together Teachers Podcast Episiode 46, What’s Stopping Your From Reaching Your Goals?

Connect with the Inspired Together Teachers Community:

Download our FREE resource: The Inspired Teachers Guide to Taking Back Your Life.

Website: https:www.inspiredtogetherteachers.com

Instagram: Inspired-Together-Teachers

Facebook: Inspired Together Teachers

Facebook Teacher Warriors Group: Teacher Warriors Facebook Group

Linked In: Inspired Together Teachers

More About Inspired Together Teachers:

Are you a teacher struggling to balance your best work with your best life?

If you are dedicated and caring but often overwhelmed and exhausted, join us at Inspired Together Teachers. We’ll give you inspiration, strategies and tips that help you navigate life’s challenges as a stronger, more confident, and more joy filled person, both in and out of the classroom.

Inspired Together Teachers will give you practical tools to experience more of what matters most in your life.

Co-hosts Paula Schmidt and Michele Vosberg are award winning educators with the experience and skills to help teachers thrive in life and work. They’ve taught at all levels, worked with thousands of teachers, and conducted workshops around the world. They are also the authors of the #1 best-selling book The Inspired Teachers Journal: A Weekly Guide to Becoming Your Best Self.

Paula and Michele would love to have you to join them on their quest to lived inspired lives.

What’s Stopping You from Reaching Your Goals? Ep. 46

January 10, 2024 by Inspired Together Teachers 2 Comments

What’s Stopping You from Reaching Your Goals? S. 4 E. 46

Listen to this episode to find our why you aren’t achieving goals and how to rethink goal setting for the new year.

Show notes:

Episode Summary:

What’s stopping YOU from achieving your goals? Goals are good for us. Goals give us something to strive for, they give us purpose and when we achieve them, can be a great source of satisfaction and pride. Goals give us direction and help us realize our dreams are within our reach. If goals are so good for us, why do we struggle so much to achieve them? What can we do to ensure we set goals that we can actually achieve? Today, we discuss common mistakes people make when setting goals and tips to make sure you are setting goals that you can achieve.

In this episode:

The following is a summary of this episode. To hear all of the stories and examples, please listen to the podcast.

Introduction:

At the time of this recording, it is just a few days into the new year. Everywhere we turn, people are making New Year’s Resolutions, setting goals for the new year and hoping to make those dreams a reality.

Goals help us turn our dreams into reality and remind us that our dreams are within our reach. However, no matter how great our intentions, many people will struggle to meet the goals they set this week and this year.

According to the University of Scranton, only 8% of people achieve their New Year’s Resolutions. 75% keep their resolutions for 1 week. After that, the percentage of people keeping their resolutions decreases each week. Within one month, only 64% of people are still trying to achieve their New Year’s resolutions. Within 6 months only 46% are still working at their goals and as we mentioned only 8% of people ultimately achieve those New Years goals.

That means 92% of people are left with unmet New Year’s Goals. With more than 40% of people making New Year’s Resolutions, that equates to a lot of disappointed people.

Let’s reiterate: 92% of people do NOT achieve their New Year’s resolutions! Not achieving our goals leads to feelings of failure, which leads to lower self-confidence. The good news is, that we can do better.

What goals have you set that you haven’t met? What goals would you like to set and achieve in the future?

6 Tips for Creating And Achieving Your Goals in 2024

1. Start with your vision for how you want your life to be, then align all of your goals to that vision.

Before we can really talk about setting goals, we need to talk about your vision for your life. What are your values? What is important to you? Who do you want to be in your life and how do you want to show up? What do you want to feel? What do you want to have?

If you don’t start here, you run the risk of creating goals, and maybe even achieving them, only to find out that you aren’t happy or fulfilled. The world is full of very high achieving, miserable people.

Your goals need to align with the life that you want. That makes them important to you and crucial for your fulfillment.

This is where vision boards come in. This is where life assessments come into play.

Think about the image of climbing a ladder to achieve your goals.

Stephen Covey that says, “If the ladder is not leaning against the right wall, every step we take just gets us to the wrong place faster.”

Doing this step also means that you will set YOUR goals, not allow your goals to be set by someone else. You are not here to live someone else’s dream.

Research shows we are less likely to meet goals set by someone else. Why? Because it often is not meaningful to us or does not align with our values and what matters most to us.

When something is more meaningful to you, when it will help you live an inspired life, you are more likely to stick to it and achieve it.

Consider a goal that you want to set in the new year. Does it align with your values and vision?

2. Be Clear and Specific. The more clarity around the goal, the better chance you have of hitting it.

Edwin Locke, a psychologist who has been central to the body of research about goal setting has been studying goals for over 40 years. His research has given us great information on why people do not meet their goals.

Make sure your goals are clear and specific.

Goals where you decide to just “do your best” at something are often not successful. Neither are goals that are convoluted to the point that they aren’t clear.

To give yourself the best chance of meeting the goal, be clear about what the goal is and what specifically you hope to achieve.

Here are a few examples:

A goal to “Do my best to lose some weight” is not as clear, specific, or simple as “I will lose one pound per week for the first 12 weeks of the year”.
A goal to “eat healthier” is not as clear, specific, or simple as “I will not eat chips, candy or ice cream for 4 weeks”.
A goal to “start working out” is not as clear, specific, or simple as “I will work out at the gym on my way home from work 3 days per week.”

Consider a goal you are working toward or would like to set.

Is it clear and specific? If not, what extra details or clarifications do you need to add to your goal to make it more specific?

In order for goals to really work, they need to be specific and they have to sufficiently challenge you.

3. Make goals challenging but not too challenging.

Locke’s research also showed that challenging goals improve performance more than easy ones.

Locke found that 90% of the time, specific and challenging goals led to higher performance than goals that were easy or vague “do your best” type of goals.

As Locke and other researchers have discovered, there is a sweet spot for challenge when setting a goal. People who set goals that are too easy, are actually less likely to achieve them. However, if you set the goal so high that it is nearly impossible to meet, you will quickly lose motivation.

You need to find the “Goldilocks” of challenge level for your specific goal.

We have all used this and understand this when working with students. There is also a sweet spot in instruction. When things are too easy and there is no challenge, students lose motivation. When something is too hard, students may just give up. That attitude is, “ I’m never going to be able to do this, so why should I even try?” It’s the same with goals.

Consider a goal you are working toward or would like to set:

If it is too easy, how can you make it more of a challenge?
Is it too challenging and complex, if so how can you simplify or pick one aspect of it to focus on?
Plan for that challenge- what will you do when it gets difficult- “If this happens, then I will bounce back by….”

4. Break the goal down into smaller, achievable and attainable pieces.

Like many things in our lives, goals are not nearly as overwhelming when they are broken into bite sized chunks.

Compare this idea to IEP goals – daily or weekly actions that are taken and tracked, all working toward an annual goal.

Consider a goal you are working toward or would like to set.

Would it be helpful to break it into smaller chunks?
Determine what you want to achieve by a specific date and write down the dates.
Track your success. Seeing a visual is motivating when you are seeing positive progress.

5. You need to believe you can achieve the goal.

Ultimately, the person who needs to believe in your ability to meet your goals the most is you! This is about your mindset and self-efficacy. If you think you won’t be successful, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. When you hit an obstacle, if you don’t believe in yourself, then you may be tempted to use that obstacle as confirmation of your inability to do the task. However, the opposite is also true. If you believe you CAN do it, then when you see a minor success, you can use it as confirmation of your ability to meet the goal.

Belief in yourself will get you through bumps in the road, and minor setbacks as they occur, so you don’t just throw up your hands and say, “See, this just wasn’t for me.”

This is confirmation bias, you get when you expect to get, just as you see what you expect to see.

“Henry Ford said it well, “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, You’re right.

6. Surround yourself with a star system of support.

We’ve talked about the importance of a star system many times. You may think of it as a dream team, but we like Shawn Achor’s vision of this. He says, “ You can be a superstar; you just can’t be one alone. What you need is a star system; a constellation of positive, authentic influencers who support each other, reinforce each other, and make each other better.”

When setting a goal, it is important to have someone who believes that you can reach your goal. Who can you find who will believe you can achieve your goal and remind you of it regularly? Those are the people will help you by serving as your support system. It doesn’t have to be a huge group, but it is important to have support from at least one person.

Part of a successful support system is accountability. The other part is that we all benefit from others’ beliefs that we can achieve. If you are not comfortable sharing your goals and dreams, you don’t have to tell your support system every detail. Tell them as much as you are comfortable with or tell them when you are comfortable enough to do so. Find people who believe in you.

Consider a goal you are working towards or that you would like to set. Who can you find to share in your dream and help you by supporting you on your path?

A Little More Motivation

We leave you with this quote from motivational speaker Les Brown:

“If you set goals and go after them with all the determination you can muster, your gifts will take you places that will amaze you.”

Recap:

Setting goals in life is important because goals give us something to strive for, give us purpose, remind us that our dreams are within reach, and when you achieve them, can be a great source of satisfaction and pride. However, it is important to be intentional in our goal setting, aligning them to our values and vision for our life and then setting goals in a way that is achievable. Our goals should be clear and specific, challenging but not too challenging, and broken down into smaller steps. Then, with support, we can go after whatever our heart desires.

Quote:

“If you set goals and go after them with all the determination you can muster, your gifts will take you places that will amaze you.”

Les Brown

Resources mentioned in this episode:

To learn more about Edwin Locke and his goal setting theories go to

https://edwinlocke.com/

Connect with the Inspired Together Teachers Community:

Download our FREE resource: The Inspired Teachers Guide to Taking Back Your Life.

Website: https:www.inspiredtogetherteachers.com

Instagram: Inspired-Together-Teachers

Facebook: Inspired Together Teachers

Facebook Teacher Warriors Group: Teacher Warriors Facebook Group

Linked In: Inspired Together Teachers

More About Inspired Together Teachers:

Are you a teacher struggling to balance your best work with your best life?

Inspired Together Teachers will give you practical tools to experience more of what matters most in your life.

Paula and Michele would love to have you to join them on their quest to lived inspired lives.

Conquering Criticism Ep. 45

January 3, 2024 by Inspired Together Teachers Leave a Comment

Conquering Criticism S. 3 Ep. 45

Listen to this episode to stop fearing your critics and conquer criticism!

Show notes:

The following is a summary of this episode. To experience the entire show, please listen to the episode.

Episode Summary:

Fear of criticism can be a powerful deterrent in our lives. Do you have a fear of failure? Are you afraid to let your real ideas and preferences known? Do your fears of what people will think ever hold you back from living a life you want to live? If any of these things are true, you might have a fear of criticism. Today, we’re talking about how to cope with and conquer criticism.

In this episode:

Fear of criticism is powerful because the criticism doesn’t even actually have to occur for the fear to set in. Just the memory of past criticism or the potential that people will not like or understand us is enough to shut us down.

Perfectionism is one sign of fear of criticism.

Many of us fear criticism. Nobody likes being criticized, but some people have people have a particularly strong fear around it.

According to thought leader and marketing guru Seth Godin, people aren’t afraid of failure. What we are really afraid of is criticism. We choose not to try new things, launch new initiatives, or say something remarkable or audacious because we worry that we will be called out. We worry that someone will hate our ideas. We don’t want to be laughed at or to feel foolish if someone remarks on something we have done.

You may have had a negative experience like that, and it changed your future behaviors.

That is why we are often afraid to step out of the box, to put new ideas into the world and to express our true feelings.

Fortunately, you can overcome fear of criticism.

Let’s look at some of the issues around fear of criticism and how we can overcome them.

Fear of criticism keeps you from sharing your ideas.

Have you ever been in a class or a workplace situation where a question or idea was shot down? Chances are, you learned not to speak up because you might get knocked down as well.

Holding back is sometimes safer than opening yourself up to possible criticism. We may not give our most genius selves to the world, but neither will we allow the world to crush us.

At work, this often shows up as not speaking up and sharing our ideas. Have you ever been at a faculty meeting and withheld a thought or idea?

We don’t want to be told, “that’s a stupid idea,” or “that will never work,” or “we tried that already and it didn’t work.”

It is a safe choice. It also keeps your unique ideas from getting into the world.

The next time you are hesitating to speak, take a few minutes to answer these questions:

Could my ideas offer something of value?

If you are thinking them, there is something there. Let it out into the world. Not everything will stick, and that is okay.

What is lost if I don’t speak up?

If it matters, it is worth bringing up your idea.

What if they don’t like my ideas?

If people don’t like your ideas, that’s fine. You can’t please everyone. If they question your ideas, you know they heard you. You know you said something worth remarking on.

What is the worse that could happen?

You might find that the worst thing that could happen is that someone will disagree with you or won’t like your idea. If that is the case, could you live with that? Usually, the answer is yes!

You worry about what people think.

This thought likely comes from someone saying this phrase to you as a child. It was meant as a reproach, as a way to stop you from doing or saying something. You may even have used this phrase yourself.

Why are we so afraid of what people think? Do we really care what they think? Sometimes, the answer should be no.

Too often, we worry about what people we don’t even know will think. Have you ever put on a clean shirt to go to the grocery store? Do you really care what the cashier thinks? Will they even notice?

Asking this question can be very liberating.

What other people think about us is none of our business.

That is an audacious and bold statement, and you may disagree. It takes confidence to let go of worrying about what other people think. After all, you can’t control what someone else thinks.

Sometimes you are your own worse critic.

External critics aren’t our only worry. Many of us also have a strong inner critic running rampant in our own head. Our inner critic is responsible for stopping us from doing many of the things we want to do.

It is easy to stop yourself from doing something. What if it doesn’t work out? What if they don’t get it? What if they think I am a narcissistic, raving lunatic?

Ask yourself what benefits you will get from whatever it is you are afraid to do. If the benefits outweigh the risks, it is worth a chance.

Tell that bully in your head to go away.

Then, commit. Believe. Go all in.

Reframe criticism as feedback.

Sometimes what we perceive as criticism is meant to help us, not to reprimand us.

Learn to listen to feedback without becoming angry or defensive. Even if you don’t agree with the feedback and didn’t invite, it might be an opportunity for growth or development. Ask yourself, “what can I learn from this?”

You might want to check out podcast episode 44, Finding Optimism in Silver Linings where we talk about finding the good in negative circumstances.

For example, put yourself into the shoes of a student. We are giving students feedback all day every day which they could easily interpret as criticism even if that is what we didn’t intend. Give ourselves the same expectations that we have for our student.

Don’t take everything so personally.

It is easy to take criticism to heart. It feels like a personal attack. It bruises our ego, which feels threatening.

Sometimes criticism is not about you. You don’t always know what someone else is going through. Maybe they are having a bad day and just need to vent, and you were the person in front of them.

The curt email from the principal might mean that she is super busy, not that she is upset with you.

Your friend didn’t text you back? She’s not mad at you, she just hasn’t seen it or she got interrupted before responding.

Discern if the criticism is worth your time and energy.

First of all, you listen. Then you analyze. It is true? Is it valid? Is it helpful? Is it for your improvement?

If it is worth listening to, act on it, if not, let it go.

Conclusion

We leave you with this quote for today from Aristotle, “There is only one way to avoid criticism: Do nothing, say nothing and be nothing.”

That’s no way to live. Instead, dare to be above average, original, and unique.

Recap:

Fear of criticism can cause us to hold ourselves back and play small. When you avoid doing things that potentially cause you to be criticized, you are also withholding something value from the world. Use criticism as an opportunity for learning, and recognize that it is not always about you. You can conquer fear of criticism!

Quote:

“There is only one way to avoid criticism: Do nothing, say nothing and be nothing.”

Aristotle

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Godin, S. (2008). Tribes: We need you to lead us. New York: Penguin Group.

Related Episodes/Blog Posts:

Inspired together Teachers podcast episode 44 Finding Optimism in Silver Linings

Connect with the Inspired Together Teachers Community:

Download our FREE resource: The Inspired Teachers Guide to Taking Back Your Life.

Website: https:www.inspiredtogetherteachers.com

Instagram: Inspired-Together-Teachers

Facebook: Inspired Together Teachers

Facebook Teacher Warriors Group: Teacher Warriors Facebook Group

Linked In: Inspired Together Teachers

More About Inspired Together Teachers:

Are you a teacher struggling to balance your best work with your best life?

Inspired Together Teachers will give you practical tools to experience more of what matters most in your life.

Paula and Michele would love to have you to join them on their quest to lived inspired lives.

Finding Optimism in Silver Linings Ep. 44

December 27, 2023 by Inspired Together Teachers 1 Comment

Finding Optimism in Silver Linings S.3. Ep 44

Listen to this episode to discover ways to find optimism in difficult circumstances.

Show notes:

Episode Summary:

Have you ever been given the advice to look for the silver lining in a tough situation? Do you give that advice yourself? What does that really mean and what are the steps we should be taking to find the silver lining? Today we are discussing optimism and why looking for the silver lining can improve your work life, home life, health, and well being

In this episode:

The following is an excerpt of key points from the podcast. For the full experience, and to hear the examples and stories that help bring the ideas to life, please listen to the podcast episode.

Introduction

“Look for the silver linings” “What’s the silver lining in this situation?” “Well, at least the silver lining is that…..”

We are guessing you have heard these phrases, or some version of these phrases, many times.

How can you make the idea of silver linings something to live by, not just flippant advice?

Because it not just flippant advice. It is actually advice that can not only lengthen your life, it can improve the quality of your life.

Let’s talk about the phrase “silver lining”.

It is:

A phrase that is hundreds of years old
A metaphor comparing the shining silvery edges of a cloud backlit by the sun or moon to finding something good that comes out of a bad situation
A form of consolation- the outcome was not what you hoped but something good came about because of it.
A beacon of hope- there is a hopeful prospect in the otherwise hopeless situation.

Ultimately, it is a metaphor that sums up optimism.

It’s looking on the bright side and realizing that something good can come out of a bad situation.

We love the visual of the dark cloud with the silver lining around it telling us that there is beauty in that darkness.

When someone looks for the silver lining, it sounds something like this: “The silver lining is that even though I didn’t win the competition, I got a lot more fit in the process.”

Or, “Even though we didn’t get the funding, I met some great new friends in the grant writing process.”

Paula: What actually triggered this podcast is a conversation I was having with a young teacher the other day who was talking about a lesson that didn’t go well in the beginning of the year. She said, “The silver lining is that I learned early on what is NOT going to work with this group of students.”

Why Optimism and Silver Linings Matter

Looking for the silver linings in life can make your days more bearable.

Bad things will happen. We can choose the pessimistic route and decide that bad things happen because the world is just a bad place. We can let the negativity overpower us. There is a lot in the world that is negative and if we look for it we can surely find it. However, no one wants to be around a negative Nancy.

It also doesn’t help to have toxic positivity.

Silver Linings are in that spot in between sulking in negativity and toxic positivity.

We acknowledge that bad situations happen but there is good that can come from them. There are lessons that can be learned if we look for them. There are people we may meet or resources we might gain that we wouldn’t have otherwise had if not for that situation.

Optimism can actually be good for your health.

There are many scientific studies that show that having a positive attitude and approaching life with optimism is good for your health and can make you live longer.

According to Harvard Health, researchers have shown that people who are optimistic and have a positive outlook on life:

Have lower levels of the stress hormone cortisol
Lower levels of markers that predict heart attack and stroke
Stay healthier
Enjoy independent living longer than pessimists.

Optimism appears to protect the heart and circulation AND increases our life span.

There was a US study of almost 7,000 college students who took a comprehensive personality test in the mid 1960s. The researchers followed them for 40 years. The most pessimistic individuals had a 42% higher rate of death than the most optimistic. Two Dutch studies followed, showing that the optimists were 55% less likely to die from cardiovascular disease than the pessimists, and the optimists enjoyed a 45% lower risk of death when not just narrowing it to heart disease.

To us, that sounds like a convincing reason to look for silver linings. So why doesn’t everyone do that?

Because sometimes it is really hard to find the silver lining. It is much easier, and less work, to just see the dark cloud.

Sometimes you really have to look for the positive.

Sometimes, just by the genetic make up of being a person, we can be risk averse. We are looking for things that challenge our physical or psychological safety. It is a negativity bias that helps us to stay safe and alive. It can be easy to see threatening things and to ONLY see those things.

Also, sometimes when life and work throw a lot of things our way, it is much easier to see things as hopeless instead of looking for things to be hopeful about. The hopeless things are the big dark cloud. They are easy to see without looking too hard.

Looking for the silver lining can be difficult because you are doing two things at once- acknowledging the bad AND looking for the good in it.

For example, think of the students who are the most challenging, the ones that force you to do things you’ve never done and who try your patience. These are the students who make you a better teacher. With time, you will probably recognize that those experiences ended up creating some of your most rewarding moments.

You can take steps to find the silver lining in adverse situations.

Look for the small glimmers of hope. They may not shine too brightly in the dark of the clouds but identify those slivers of light on the edges of the situation. It is likely they are peripheral to the actual situation. Look on the outside of the situation.
Make a pros and cons list. If it is tough situation there will likely be more cons, but any of the pros you find are a part of your silver lining.
Ask others to help you find the silver lining. Friends who are not as engrossed in the situation as you are can sometimes have a more distanced perspective and can see things that may not be as clear to you.
When you find yourself listing all of the negatives of a situation, step back and give yourself time and space to look at it from a different perspective. Take a few deep breaths, change your environment or put it aside until tomorrow. Come back to it later with a fresh set of eyes and you may see that silver lining you did not see the first time.

Recap:

Negative situations will happen in your work and home life. Intentionally taking time to find the silver linings can improve your work life, home life, health ,and well being. Pessimism, and choosing to see only the dark cloud is easier, but choosing optimism and finding the silver lining will benefit you now and well into the future.

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The Power of Traditions Ep. 43

December 20, 2023 by Inspired Together Teachers Leave a Comment

The Power of Traditions S. 3 E. 43

Listen to this episode to explore the ways in which traditions shape our lives.

Show notes:

Episode Summary:

This is the time of year when we are all involved in planning for and carrying out traditions. What are your traditions? Do you follow traditions from your childhood or have you changed them or even gotten rid of them? Why do we even have traditions and is there still value in them? Today, we’re talking about traditions and how they affect or personal life and our life at school.

In this episode:

Note: As always, this is just a summary of the actual podcast. Please listen to the podcast for all of the examples and stories that we share.

Season’s greetings! If you’re listening to this podcast on or near the date this episode drops, we are in the midst of the holidays. We were talking about the traditions we celebrate and we decided it would be a great topic to discuss on the podcast!

So, what is the big deal with traditions? Why do we continue to follow them year after year, sometimes for a life time and sometimes for hundreds and maybe even thousands of years? Should we even bother with traditions?

And what about school traditions? What purpose do they serve? How could use traditions to strengthen your school or classroom community?

Why do we have and need traditions?

Traditions help connect one generation to another.

A common tradition is passing down beloved family recipes such as Grandma’s sugar cookies, family foods and other recipes. Food and traditions around food are often deeply ingrained in us. Passing them down through generations helps those who use the recipes or eat the foods to become connected to those who have gone on before.

Holiday parties are another tradition that bring generations together which allows the younger members of the family to spend time with grandparents or great grandparents. Holidays bring their own traditions of gifts, music, and activities that are carried down from family to family for generations.

Another example of a tradition that helps connect different groups involves student writing. One fifth grade teacher has her students write stories and memories of their year. They then turn their writing into a book and each students gets a copy. Students also write a book of letters for the next year’s students. These are full of fun stories, things to look out for, and generally give advice to students for how to be successful in the class next year. This is a fun tradition and the books are hysterical!

Traditions help teach us about our history.

Religious traditions often help people to understand and learn their religion. For example putting up a creche or nativity set, or lighting Hanukkah menorah or Kwanza Kinara often starts a conversation about the meaning of the tradition.

Another example is Armistice Day, or Remembrance Day on Nov. 11^th which celebrates the end of the first World War. It is a big deal in France, where the entire country shuts down and people visit cemeteries to honor their families. It also occurs in other countries including the United States. People wear small paper poppies on their lapels, a reminder of all of those who died during the war. When young people ask about the poppies, they learn about the history of the war and how it devastated a generation of young people, particularly young soldiers.

In Paula’s family there is a baptismal dress which has been worn by over 100 people. It was made by her great-great-great grandmother in the early to mid -1800s. It has been worn by her relatives, including herself and her children, since that time. The dress helps her family members connect to others in their family tree.

Traditions keep cultures alive.

Whether or not we know it, many of our traditions came from our families’ long history and cultural ways of living. This includes foods eaten in different parts of the world, the music of a culture, and the arts.

Recently friends of ours celebrated their wedding on Dia De Los Muertos, or Day of the Dead, a tradition day of celebration in Mexican cultures. It is a day to honor beloved relatives who have died. The wedding celebration included traditional marigolds and other beautiful, brightly colored flowers, painted faces and an offering of favorite foods and beverages surrounded by photos of departed family members. Far from a somber or scary occasion, it was the unity of two people as a new family while honoring and respecting those who have passed on.

We were fortunate enough to be able to visit a school in Ecuador which was called an indigenous school. In addition to modern learning activities, the school was intentional about keeping cultures of the families alive. There were days where students wore their tribal dress and did their tribal dances. They learned about ancient herbs that were used for medicinal purposes, and grew a garden of foods that had been grown in their mountain homelands. Even in the center of a multicultural city of over a million people, they celebrated their culture as an important part of their heritage. These teachers and families are being proactive in remembering their culture, and hopefully the children will not forget their background and traditions.

Traditions reinforce values.

When Paula’s young daughter learned that firemen had to work on Christmas, she felt bad for them. The family decided to make cookies and deliver them to the fire station on Christmas Eve. It was a way of honoring the people who do the work so we can spend time with our families. It is a great example of how traditions reinforce our values.

Schools often have canned good collections around the holidays. Kids bring in cans of food, which teaches them to be thoughtful about the needs of others. It reinforces the value of kindness.

A school where Michele taught held track and field days at the end of the school year. Each team had one kindergartener, one first grader, etc. The older kids took care of the younger ones and helped them to do well in the events. The emphasis was on life skills such as working together, playing fairly, and trying without giving up. The awards included typical event winners, but also included things like working together, kindness, following the rules, being encouraging etc. It was a great way to teach and reinforce values in a really fun way.

Traditions give us something to look forward to.

Think of the anticipation before a holiday or yearly event, you get to think about and plan for and get excited about something that is coming. We count down the days and look forward to the events. We all need that.

At school, students often look forward to traditions such as Homecoming activities. It adds some fun and can really bring energy to a school. Schools encourage crazy hats, skits, and other engaging activities. These things help students to see school as someplace that is fun, and it is a place they want to be. Wouldn’t we be better off if all students loved school and looked forward to it?

Traditions help people to create memories.

Think about those times when you get the camera out, when you gather people and talk and eat, and laugh and sing. Think of the times you most remember, and weddings, birthdays and holidays will likely be well represented.

Paula’s family creates gingerbread houses, and each year they pull up pictures from all the previous 15 years before beginning this year’s house.

Think of school traditions such as concerts, sporting events, musicals, plays, prom, and graduation. All of these traditions create memories, many which we carry with us throughout our lives. We both have memories from elementary school concerts. It was such fun to go back to school at night. We were all dressed up and loved seeing all the families and our teachers in the gym. It was special and magical.

Another example is in our family Christmas ornaments. We both get ornaments for our children each year. We try to choose something that represents their interests or special events that year. It is a fun way to save memories and fun to open up the ornaments each year and remember the times and places that inspired them.

Traditions offer us a chance to pause and reflect on life, and to recognize what is important.

We don’t always take time to slow down and reflect on our lives. Celebrations and traditions often help us to do that. For example, when you attend a wedding, you likely reflect back on your own wedding. Or when you put up the Christmas tree and see all the family ornaments and remember the stories behind the events through the years or the places you traveled. It will remind you of what is important.

Events like these offer us a moment to slow down, relax, and think.

In school, yearbooks often serve as a reflection tool, as do end of year celebrations or class parties. Those things allow you to look back on the year and remember the things that happened.

Graduations mark an end of one chapter and the beginning another. The speakers’ messages can usually relate to any transition and remind us of the things that matter in our lives. Though the speaker may be talking to the graduates, others also have a chance to pause and reflect.

Traditions can be reconsidered.

Some people balk at traditions or find them old and stuffy. Sometimes traditions seem forced on you and you no longer want to uphold them. You are allowed to rethink traditions. Some need to be adapted, some may need to be dropped completely, and others are worth keeping.

Michele’s family had a apricot Jello salad that had been included in the holiday meals for many years. After several years of dumping the Jello down the drain after no one ate it, she realized that it was time to reconsider. The apricot Jello era ended, though other items on the menu such as turkey and dressing stayed.

In Paula’s family, they can no longer use the baptismal dress. It has become too worn and threadbare. Now they need to rethink the tradition. After years of celebrating Christmas with her cousins, now that they all have their own families, they plan summer get togethers at a park instead. The tradition of getting together is still there, but it has changed.

We’ve both kept the tradition of giving Christmas gifts, but rather than many little gifts, we got growing up, we now give their children a family experience or trip.

Some traditions deserve to be eliminated. One example is hazing. Hazing used to be tolerated and accepted. Today, hazing is a tradition that is no longer acceptable. The Northwestern football coach was recently fired for allowing hazing. Similarly, schools with potentially hurtful team or mascot names have changed their name to something related but less offensive.

Sometimes it is time for a tradition to end.

Some traditions deserve to stick around.

We have traditions that serve us well and that we hope to continue. Paula plans to continue the ornaments, hopefully with her grandchildren someday. Michele plans to host her entire extended family for Christmas as long as she is able.

Whether we adapt them, get rid of them, or keep them, traditions serve a purpose.

According to Nicola Watts,

“In our fast paced and ever-changing lives and a world that appears to be in constant turmoil, traditions are more important than ever before. They offer constancy, stability, familiarity and a semblance of order and predictability to our existence. They comfort us, give us a sense of belonging, and make us feel safe and secure.”

Recap:

Traditions serve many purposes in our lives. They help connect us to other people, help us to remember who we are and where we came from, and help us to pass down and reinforce values. Traditions are fun and create time and space for togetherness and building memories.

Quote:

Nicola Watts

Connect with the Inspired Together Teachers Community:

Download our FREE resource: The Inspired Teachers Guide to Taking Back Your Life.

Website: https:www.inspiredtogetherteachers.com

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Facebook: Inspired Together Teachers

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Linked In: Inspired Together Teachers

More About Inspired Together Teachers:

Are you a teacher struggling to balance your best work with your best life?

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Creating Your Life Vision: Beyond the Vision Board S.4 E. 47

Listen to this episode to learn how to create your life vision and then bring it to reality.

Show notes:

Episode Summary:

In this episode:

Step One: Creating a vision for your life.

Step 2: Keep your vision in front of you.

Step 3 Keep your vision in your head but move with your feet.

You have to do the work.

Visualization Research

Visualization helps you to become the person you need to be in order to get the things you want to have.

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What’s Stopping You from Reaching Your Goals? S. 4 E. 46

Listen to this episode to find our why you aren’t achieving goals and how to rethink goal setting for the new year.

Show notes:

Episode Summary:

In this episode:

Introduction:

6 Tips for Creating And Achieving Your Goals in 2024

1. Start with your vision for how you want your life to be, then align all of your goals to that vision.

3. Make goals challenging but not too challenging.

4. Break the goal down into smaller, achievable and attainable pieces.

A Little More Motivation

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Conquering Criticism S. 3 Ep. 45

Listen to this episode to stop fearing your critics and conquer criticism!

Show notes:

Episode Summary:

Fear of criticism keeps you from sharing your ideas.

You worry about what people think.

Sometimes you are your own worse critic.

Reframe criticism as feedback.

Don’t take everything so personally.

Discern if the criticism is worth your time and energy.

Conclusion

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Finding Optimism in Silver Linings S.3. Ep 44

Listen to this episode to discover ways to find optimism in difficult circumstances.

Episode Summary:

In this episode:

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The Power of Traditions S. 3 E. 43

Listen to this episode to explore the ways in which traditions shape our lives.

Show notes:

Episode Summary:

In this episode:

Why do we have and need traditions?

Recap:

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