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Create Your Best Life Ep. 91

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Create Your Best Life Season 6 Episode 91

string with sticky notes: create your future, title Create Your Best Life

Listen to this episode if you want to stop living on autopilot and step into the life you want to live. Join us in our 4 week challenge and create your best life!

Show Notes:

Episode Summary:

Have you ever felt like you’re living on autopilot? You get the essentials done and have good intentions for doing some things you’d love to do, but somehow you never get around to it? Has the day-to-day routine taken over the person you used to be, and sometimes you wonder whatever happened to the person you once were?

Maybe you have goals and dreams and plans and you’re yearning for a life you know is possible but somehow can’t seem to create. You want to close the gap between the life you are living now and the life you know you are capable of having.

If any of those things resonate with you, join us as we begin a brand new four-week challenge designed to help you create your best life.

In this episode:

These show notes are not a word-for-word script of the podcast. As always, we often talk back and forth and share comments and examples. Please listen to the podcast for the best experience.

Introduction:

You’ve probably heard us talk about our quest to live an inspired life. If not, you can go back to listen to episode 1 of this podcast, The Inspired Life. We created this podcast to create a community of like-minded people who also want to be inspired.

So, how do you create your best life? How do we do it? Today we are going to dig into that topic a little more and reframe it. It’s not enough to dream of the life you want or wait for someday when you have more time. It is a process, and it requires attention and action.

We’ve been on this journey to create our best life for quite a while, and we are not here with all the answers and we’re certainly not proclaiming that we have the perfect life, we have been deep into the research and we’ve used lots of strategies taken lots of steps.

We’re inviting you into the process as we continue on this path.

Who are you to want more?

Sometimes we feel like we can’t complain. Our life isn’t terrible, and certainly others have it far worse. You might comfortably numb. You know you are in this space when someone asks you how you are and you reply, “ fine”, or “busy”, or “surviving, “ or sarcastically, “ living the dream.”

Who are you to not want more? Are we supposed to settle for ok?

When is a time when you have settled for less that you should? How did you feel?

The question is not,” Who are you to want more?”,  the questions should be, “who are you not to?”.

Laurie Santos, A happiness researcher at Harvard says, “we’re entitled to and capable of much more joy than we have settled for.”

Ouch!

How did we lose ourselves?

For this, we turn to the work of Jonathan Fields, author of the book How to Live a Good Life and creator of The Good Life Project Podcast.

Fields says we all have three buckets that need to be filled in order to live a good life. As teachers, you likely know and use this analogy. Teachers often talk about filling their buckets, or helping kids understand how to fill their buckets or other’s buckets.

Sometimes our buckets get a small leak, and then they empty out bit by bit. It usually isn’t one, big, traumatic event that creates a problem, it is a small leak that over time, causes a big ripple. You don’t notice it, because each tiny bit isn’t much in itself, but together it can be devastating.

What are the three buckets?

We are going to introduce each of these buckets today, but over the next several weeks we will dig into each bucket and share some activities to help you keep your buckets full.

Bucket 1- Vitality

The vitality bucket includes body and mind, both physical and mental health. It is the absence of pain, stress, burnout, depression and anxiety.

It includes traits such as a sense of calm, peace, and optimism.

When the vitality bucket leaks, we deteriorate either physically or mentally or both.

Bucket 2- Connection

This bucket is our relationships bucket. We know from longitudinal happiness studies that strong relationships are the number one key to a happy and fulfilling life.

Our connections bucket is your relationships with family, friends, colleagues, community, students, and even spirituality or belief in a higher power.

This is where we get our sense of belonging and love which is one of Maslow’s core needs. It is also the source of laughter, feeling understood and validated. Our connections can help us to feel alive.

When the connection bucket is leaking, life gets more dull. We know something is missing.

 Bucket 3- Contribution

The contribution bucket is where we hold meaning in our lives. It is where we connect to something greater than ourselves. It is also where we bring our gifts into the world.

It is accessing your full potential- finding flow. You are using your gifts, your strengths, your interests in a way that is fulfilling. You feel good. You feel like you are doing something impactful or useful in the world.

Our contribution bucket is where we do what matters. When we feel like we are not contributing in any positive way, we feel a loss. Something is missing.

Teachers know this. They feel a higher calling- it is not about the money. They know that they are doing things that help students. Yet if you work very hard and don’t believe you are having any kind of impact, it is easy to become unmotivated.

 In order to create our best life, all three of these buckets are important.

Think about what happens if you have good health and good connections, but find your work meaningless. Nothing feels worthwhile. There is no great joy. You feel a loss of potential. You are likely going through the motions.

Or imagine have meaningful work, and you are using your gifts in ways that matter, but you have a lack of connection in your life. This is loneliness.

Or you have great connections and meaningful work, but your body or mind hurts.

In the next few weeks, we are going to dig into ideas to examine and strengthen all of your buckets.

Today, we start by giving you a short activity.

The 60 Second Snapshot  (Jonathan Fields)

This activity is designed to help you assess how full or empty each of your buckets are. It is not meant to shame you or judge you, nor is it meant to be a permanent answer. As you go through life, you will likely have different answers at different times, even from day to day.

Answer the following 3 questions:

  1. Vitality: At this moment in time, how satisfied am I with my current level of physical ability, energy, appearance, well-being, my ability to weather adversity, and my capacity to feel calm, aware, present, in charge, optimistic and joyful?
  2. Connection: At this moment in time, how satisfied am I with the depth and quality of my loving relationships, friendships, and sense of genuine belonging?
  3. Contribution: At this moment in time, how satisfied am I with the level of meaning that I feel from the way I am bring my gifts to the world? Am I doing what matters?

Remember this is just one snapshot, one moment in time.

Can you feel a leak somewhere?  Where do you see room for improvement?  Which question caught you off guard?

What is one small step you could take to fill one of your buckets?

Michele: I sometimes struggle with the contribution bucket. I work really hard at things where I don’t see an impact for a long time. That can be very unmotivating. This week I’m going to create a playlist of 4 or 5 songs that will help keep me inspired to create my best life. This can help me fill my contribution bucket and remind me that what I do matters.

Paula:  This week I’m going to focus on vitality. I am sick from over doing it. I have physical outward signs that my vitality is suffering. This week, I am going to prioritize my sleep. I will listen to my body and sleep when I need to sleep.

What could you do this week to fill one of your three buckets? Let us know, we’d love to hear your ideas.

Conclusion:

We end today with the following quote from Jonathan Fields,

“A good life isn’t a place at which you arrive, it’s a lens through which you see and create your world.”

Recap:

Three keys to help you create your best life include vitality, connections, and meaningful contributions.  We will explore each of these in the coming weeks.

You have a choice. You can live on autopilot, living in a future set by someone else’s agenda, or you can create the life you want to live.

Quote:

“A good life isn’t a place at which you arrive,

it’s a lens through which you see and create your world.”

Jonathan Fields

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Book: How to Live a Good Life by Jonathan Fields

Related Episodes/Blog Posts:

Inspired Together Teachers Podcast Episode 1 The Inspired Life

Connect with the Inspired Together Teachers Community:

Download our FREE resource: The Inspired Teachers Guide to Taking Back Your Life.

Website: https:www.inspiredtogetherteachers.com

Instagram: Inspired-Together-Teachers

Facebook: Inspired Together Teachers

Inspired Together Teachers Network  Facebook Group

Linked In:  Inspired Together Learning

More About Inspired Together Teachers:

Are you a teacher struggling to balance your best work with your best life?

If you are dedicated and caring but often overwhelmed and exhausted, join us at Inspired Together Teachers. We’ll give you inspiration, strategies and tips that help you navigate life’s challenges as a stronger, more confident, and more joy filled person, both in and out of the classroom.

Inspired Together Teachers will give you practical tools to experience more of what matters most in your life.

Co-hosts Paula Schmidt and Michele Vosberg are award winning educators with the experience and skills to help teachers thrive in life and work. They’ve taught at all levels, worked with thousands of teachers, and conducted workshops around the world. They are also the authors of the #1 best-selling book The Inspired Teachers Journal: A Weekly Guide to Becoming Your Best Self.

Paula and Michele would love to have you to join them on their quest to lived inspired lives.

This post may use affiliate links. If you purchase an item through our link, we will receive a small portion of the profit with no extra cost to you. This helps us to pay for the costs of bringing this free podcast to our community.

 

Inspirational and Motivational Influencers Ep. 90

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 Inspirational and Motivational Influencers

Season 6   Episode  90

phone with podcast playing, Inspirational and Motivational Influencers

What are we listening to now? Listen to this episode to find out what to look for in following inspirational and motivational influencers.  

 

Show Notes:

Episode Summary:

For the last 20+ years, there is no denying that the world has been radically shaped by social media influencers. Whether directly or indirectly, how we dress, decorate, or spend our money has been shaped by online influencers.

There are also motivational and inspirational leaders who have used the social media available to them to share their positive and insightful messages with the world. They challenge us to show up in the world as our best selves, they give us quotes to live by and they remind us of our strength and perseverance.

In this episode we share what we look for in inspirational and motivational social media influencers. We also share some influencers we’re currently following. If you aren’t following them yet, we bet you will be by the end of this episode.

Introduction:

Ah, the social media influencers. They are there every time we pick up our phones to scroll. 20 years ago that wasn’t even a thing and now, depending on how much time you spend on social media, you could be hearing hours and hours of social media influencers’ thoughts each week.

With the advent of YouTube in 2005, Instagram in 2010, and new social media outlets popping up regularly, social media not only became a way to share ideas, it also reinvented how people promoted brands, products, and ideas.

All of a sudden we were no longer learning about products through television commercials, but were instead hearing about them from celebrities and soon-to-be-social media celebrities in the feeds on our phones.

When was the last time you actually watched a commercial?  Today we stream things or fast forward through commercials.

It is pretty crazy when you think about the reach that some of these social media influencers have. Of course, the number of followers and degree of influence can vary drastically. Some of the most popular influencers have millions of followers and endorse multiple products.

In today’s episode, we will share ideas about social media THOUGHT influencers. We stress the word THOUGHT. These are influencers who use social media to put positive thoughts out into the world. They motivate us and they inspire us. They use the platform of social media to challenge our negative thoughts and to encourage us to live our  very best lives.

Specifically, we share three things we look for when finding social media inspirational influencers to follow and we then share a few of our favorite social media motivational thought influencers.

3 things to look for when deciding which social media inspirational and motivational  influencers to follow:

They share your values.

 We have done several episodes in which we have talked about staying true to your values. It is a key component of living an inspired and fulfilling life. We are at our best when our actions align with our values. We should be striving to surround ourselves with people who value the same things we do. What is the feed that is going into your head?

The beauty of social media is that there are likely hundreds or even thousands of motivational and inspirational social media influencers who share the same values as you.

Here is where a word of caution is needed. Just because they share some values with you does not mean they will motivate or inspire you. For example, there are teacher influencers who share the value of love of teaching with you. However, they may use their platform only to sell cute bulletin board templates and behavior management charts that they sell on Teachers Pay Teachers. You may share the value of teaching as a vocation but dislike behavior charts. It doesn’t align with your values. You likely will not be inspired or motivated by their posts. They might be great for someone else to follow, but their values are not aligned with yours.

On the other hand, you may find motivation in your teaching and life from a non-teaching influencer. For example, we are always motivated by Natalie Ellis from Bossbabes who has millions of followers. Her career is not teaching but her message of helping women “make more money + live a lifestyle they love” speaks to our values so we find her very motivational. She is real and shares the good things and the challenges.

They are authentic.

Being in education, you can likely read people fairly well. You can tell when people are being authentic and when they are putting on a show. If you feel like someone is not authentic, you are not going to trust them. In that case, move on and find another inspirational influencer.

Sometimes you can tell when someone is only trying to pitch you something. They are acting and you sense that you are not getting to know the real person. For example, you have all heard of influencers who say how much they love a product so they can pitch it and make money but then find out later that they never even bought the product. The same kind of thing can happen with a thought leader. In some cases, they aren’t even selling a product, they are selling themselves as a brand.

This can be a touchy point, because many of the inspirational leaders have written books or have courses they sell.

Selling something doesn’t make the influencer inauthentic. If they have a great message and you want to buy a book, a course or a membership to hear more of their thoughts, great! However, if you feel they aren’t being authentic and they are just trying to sell you something, it may mean it is time to move on and find another influencer.

In many cases, authentic influencers didn’t write the book or create the course just to sell. They wrote it or created it to educate. Social media became a place to share their knowledge and insight. Of course they want to sell, but the selling didn’t come before the product.

We want to reiterate that just because someone is selling something it does not mean they are not authentic. Being in the online world costs money. There are expensive websites, software, graphic design programs … the list goes on and on. And that doesn’t even count the hours spent creating content.  Would you go to a book store and expect the books to be free? Of course not.

Paula: There is one popular motivational influencer I like to follow….sometimes. I loved her first book and her second. Usually, I like reading her thoughts about being a mother and better person. However, there are times I have felt that she was inauthentic on certain topics, just to put her voice into a popular topic when I felt like she was stretching to make it meaningful for her. I typically find myself being drawn back into what she is posting but I feel like there is a clear difference when she is being authentic and she isn’t. This motivational influencer has over half a million followers on Instagram alone so she is clearly speaking in a way that people listen, but I can easily move in and out of following her based on how authentic I feel she is being at any given time.

You find their words inspirational and motivational.

When you read their quotes, you commit them to memory. Think about the last quote you saw on social media that spoke to you in a way that inspired you. Whoever posted it might be an influencer you want to follow!

We both love Brene Brown and Daniel Pink as motivational and inspirational leaders who have used social media to grow their audiences into millions of followers. The other day, Brene Brown posted a Daniel Pink quote on her social media. For us that was a sign that we are following like-minded people! We have quoted both Brene Brown and Daniel Pink many times on our podcast. Why? They inspire us and motivate us. They challenge us to think differently. Not only do we quote them on our podcasts, we copy down their quotes and use them for sounding boards for our lives.

The next time you are scrolling through your social media and see a quote you want to commit to memory, note the author and the person who posted it. The odds are good that one of them might be a social media motivator that you want to follow.

Michele: I secretly collect quotes. I have a physical notebook and write them down when I like them. We often use those quotes on the podcast or in our workshops. I also write them in my planner- one quote every week because quotes inspire me.

 A few of our favorite social media inspirational and motivational influencers…

 Now that we have discussed what we look for in a motivational and inspirational social media influencer, we will briefly share a few of our favorites in case you would like a jump start in finding some people you might enjoy following.

 Brene Brown

 There are so many things we love about Brene Brown and we are not the only ones. She has millions of followers across multiple social media platforms. She is a researcher and a storyteller. We love her messages about vulnerability, courage, shame and empathy. We also love her books. But when we don’t have time to sit down and read, the videos, podcast episodes and posts she shares regularly on social media are small doses of the inspiration we need.

Malcom Gladwell

 With almost a half million followers on Instagram and almost a million on each of his other social media platforms, Malcom Gladwell is as entertaining as he is inspirational. You may know him as the New York Times bestselling author of Blink, Outliers, and other books or maybe you know his Revisionist History podcast but if you don’t know him as a motivational social media influencer, it may be time to follow him. On an interesting side note, Gladwell has even written on, and spoken about, the power and limitations of social media. Malcolm Gladwell is quirky, and he is an original thinker.

Arthur Brooks

 Arthur Brooks is a social scientist who studies leadership and happiness. We are very interested in happiness research. He has a lot to say about happiness!

Michele: I  took a course from him at Harvard and he was also a really good teacher. He also writes a column, How to Build a Life in the Atlantic which I like. Like most of my recommendations, I came to him through his books and research first, then followed him on Linked In.  That is usually how I find thought leaders, through their books first.

Daniel Pink

Though Daniel Pink doesn’t have as many followers as Brene Brown or Malcom Gladwell, he is only in the hundreds of thousands, lol, his message is just as powerful. Daniel Pink is a great example of someone who shares a lot of inspirational quotes. Most of his quotes are by famous people you would recognize and most of them. He talks about  about motivation, personal growth and creativity. If you like to read motivational quotes, be sure to follow Daniel Pink. We’ve shared tidbits from hi book Drive many times. If you are interested in motivation, check out Dan Pink.

Elizabeth Gilbert

Elizabeth Gilbert is a creative soul. She wrote the book Big Magic. You may also know her from the book Eat, Pray, Love or from the movie. She has a creative mind. She puts ideas together in ways that others don’t, which is fascinating.

Gabby Bernstein

Gabby Bernstein teaches about mindset shifts, which we often talk about on our podcast. Her shifts seem a bit wild at first, and her approaches may seem unusual at first. She is very real, honest and authentic about her own personal struggles and insights. She brings new ideas and news ways of thinking. She might help you with your own mindset shifts.

Adam Grant

Adam Grant is a researcher first and an influencer second. His ideas often connect to things we are interested in, such as human potential, which is a topic we have discussed and even create an entire workshop around. His discussions are also backed with science. We life like Shawn Achor, author of Big Potential, and The Happiness Advantage, and James Clear who wrote Atomic Habits for the same reason.

Conclusion

We end with this quote by author and speaker, Dave Willis:

“Don’t use social media to impress people; use it to impact people.”

That is exactly what social media inspirational and motivational influencers have the power to do.

Make sure you follow those that understand that power and use it to make your life better.

 Recap:

In this episode we shared three important things to look for in a social media inspirational and motivational influencers- shared values, authenticity, and quotes you want to commit to memory. We also shared a few of our favorite social media motivational influencers. If you decide to follow them, we hope you find them as motivational and inspirational as we do.

Quote:

Dave Willis

“Don’t use social media to impress people; use it to impact people.”

Dave Willis

Connect with the Inspired Together Teachers Community:

Download our FREE resource: The Inspired Teachers Guide to Taking Back Your Life.

Website: https:www.inspiredtogetherteachers.com

Instagram: Inspired-Together-Teachers

Facebook: Inspired Together Teachers

Inspired Together Teachers Network  Facebook Group

Linked In:  Inspired Together Learning

More About Inspired Together Teachers:

Are you a teacher struggling to balance your best work with your best life?

If you are dedicated and caring but often overwhelmed and exhausted, join us at Inspired Together Teachers. We’ll give you inspiration, strategies and tips that help you navigate life’s challenges as a stronger, more confident, and more joy filled person, both in and out of the classroom.

Inspired Together Teachers will give you practical tools to experience more of what matters most in your life.

Co-hosts Paula Schmidt and Michele Vosberg are award winning educators with the experience and skills to help teachers thrive in life and work. They’ve taught at all levels, worked with thousands of teachers, and conducted workshops around the world. They are also the authors of the #1 best-selling book The Inspired Teachers Journal: A Weekly Guide to Becoming Your Best Self.

Paula and Michele would love to have you to join them on their quest to lived inspired lives.

This post may use affiliate links. If you purchase an item through our link, we will receive a small portion of the profit with no extra cost to you. This helps us to pay for the costs of bringing this free podcast to our community.

Declutter Your Thoughts Ep. 89

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Declutter Your Thoughts

Season 6 Episode 89

 

person's head full of thoughts, Declutter Your Thoughts

Check out this episode to find out declutter your thoughts to  tame the racing in your head!

 Show notes: 

 Episode Summary:

Do you ever feel like you have so many thoughts running through your head that you can’t really get a grasp on any of them? Do you feel like all of these thoughts keep you from thinking the happy and peaceful thoughts you want to think? We certainly do.

In this episode we explore how we can take 5 simple, common, home-decluttering strategies and apply them to decluttering our thoughts.

Decluttering our thoughts isn’t nearly as difficult as you might imagine, AND it will give us all more time to focus on the thoughts that really matter.

 Introduction:

In the past few years, we have all either heard, read or listened to experts telling us how to declutter our homes.

Can you hear Marie Kondo’s voice in your head or are you imagining the tv show Hot Mess House on Discovery Plus?

Because of her decluttering advice, Marie Kondo’s name has become a household name, in some cases even a verb, as in “I am going to Marie Kondo my closet today.” What is so amazing about Marie Kondo and others is that their simple wisdom about what could appear at a quick glance to be about decluttering a room or a house, was actually life-changing for millions of people.

What Marie Kondo and other decluttering experts helped us to see is that if you have a lot of clutter, it can prevent you from feeling good about yourself and your life. We all started realizing that if we reduce the clutter in our lives, we can improve our mental health and decluttering also can help us to focus on what we really value.

Marie’s philosophy on clutter and life, is probably best summarized with this quote, “To truly cherish the things that are important to you, you must first discard those that have outlived their purpose. To throw away what you no longer need is neither wasteful nor shameful.”

That is great advice for decluttering our houses…. and all those thoughts spinning around in our head every day!

Let’s rewrite her famous quote just a bit to apply to decluttering our thoughts:  “To truly cherish the thoughts that are important to you, you must first discard those thoughts that have outlived their purpose. To throw away thoughts that you no longer need is neither wasteful nor shameful.”

What we see in this is the connection between the decluttering of our physical space and also the decluttering of our thoughts. In the crazy, busy world we are in, information is coming at us like water from a firehouse. Our brains rarely get a change to slow down. They are cluttered with too many thoughts. Decluttering these thought is good and it is necessary.

So, we share 5 tips, designed to help declutter your home, that will work perfectly to declutter all of those thoughts we are experiencing as well! Mental clutter can build up quickly, so let’s Marie Kondo it out!

Decluttering Tip #1: Declutter Regularly

We learned from the organizational gurus of the last few years that decluttering on a regular basis can help keep your home clean and make the process of maintaining the sense of zen easier. Decluttering can’t just be a “one and done.” It needs to be an ongoing and intentional process.

The same can be said for decluttering our thoughts. Think of the volume of thoughts that come into heads every second of the day.

This is where habits and living mindfully connect.

Paula: We have both talked about how we like to have our quiet time in the morning. For me, that is a time to declutter my thoughts. Over a cup of coffee, I can journal, allowing me to focus on specific thoughts and shut out the others that don’t matter at that moment. I get up before everyone else in my house, every day, so I can have that time. My best thinking of the day happens at that time, because I can declutter using some of the strategies we will discuss here today, but most importantly, I do it daily. If I decluttered my thoughts early in the morning once per year, it wouldn’t have nearly as much of an impact as it does doing it daily.

Michele: My brain often feels like it is exploding with too much information. I take in a lot of information intentionally. I read a lot. I make lists endlessly. Once I have written something on a list, I can usually stop the panic in my head. Of course I usually have multiple lists so I can keep things organized- a work list, a home to-do list, even lists of books I want to read or lists for individual projects.

Decluttering Tip #2: Start Small

 The home decluttering experts emphasize repeatedly how important it is to break down your decluttering task into smaller, more manageable chunks.

For example, if you want to declutter your bedroom, they suggest you start small- choosing a small area of your room to organize- one dresser drawer for example. Or if you are starting with your closet, they say not to try to tackle the whole thing in a day- start with 5 minutes at a time.

If you’re new to decluttering, you can slowly build momentum with just five minutes a day, or maybe you start with 5 minutes on the first day and add an additional minute to your decluttering tasks each day until you are decluttering 10 or 15 minutes each day.

The same theory is true with decluttering your thoughts. If your brain feels like it is going 100 miles an hour, all day every day, saying that you are going to meditate for 3 hours each day to clear your thoughts is going to lead to failure. Start small. Break the decluttering of your thoughts into smaller, more manageable chunks of time.

Paula: I have gotten into a habit sometime over the past few years of setting the timer on my phone for 1 minute or 2 minutes if I feel like my thoughts are racing and it is impacting my thinking. I just sit for that 1 or 2 minutes and breath, following the meditation process of not thinking anything on purpose, letting thoughts flow in and out of my head like passing clouds but not focusing on them. I am always amazed at the difference I feel after just 1 or 2 minutes.

Of course I can’t do that all day, and we could never do that while teaching, but there is something to be said for the power in finding 1 or 2 minutes to declutter our thoughts. Trying to do that same exercise for 30 or 40 minutes whenever I feel like my thoughts are really racing would never work. I don’t have that long of a chunk of time. Try it in the car or taking a minute or two alone in the bathroom to just breathe.

Michele: I wish I could do that- let the thoughts just float by me. A few minutes organizing my calendar or my lists helps. It also helps to journal- or just write things down. If it is written down, I know the thought is safe or that it had been attended to. Then I can either let it go or deal with it later.

Decluttering Tip #3: Take Out the Trash

Decluttering experts warn that before you can organize the things that are important to you, you’ll need to get rid of the stuff that isn’t. They suggest going through the space you want to organize with a trash bag, stuffing the bag with things you know you don’t need. They encourage people to be ruthless when clearing out your space. If it’s expired, you don’t need it. Throw it.

The idea is to not organize the junk!

When decluttering your life, the experts suggest trashing the apps on your phone that you don’t need. Look at the apps on your phone. When was the last time you used some of them? How many subscriptions do you automatically pay for that you no longer need? Deleting what you haven’t used in the past few months is a good way to quickly declutter your devices and give yourself some extra space.

Some experts suggest you throw away, or give away, one item away each day. This would remove 365 items every single year from your home. If you increased this to 2 per day, you would have given away 730 items you no longer needed. That’s a lot of stuff.

Now, let’s think about what this means for decluttering your thoughts. It means you have permission to trash those thoughts that are expired. What are the thoughts you no longer need? Get rid of those first. Getting these thoughts out of your head will give you space to examine the remaining thoughts more clearly.

Michele: The thoughts I often need to trash are the ones concerning other people. I can’t control other people. I have to let go ideas about what they should do or how they should handle something. I can’t solve all the problems, it isn’t mine to solve. I have to let it go! It’s hard to do sometimes, it’s a practice and it is evolving.

Paula: For me, the expired thoughts, that I need to trash, are negative things that people have said to me in the past that stick in my head but are no longer relevant. These may be criticisms that were legit that I have fixed or they may be unfounded remarks that were trash from the beginning but I have held on to them and they reemerge when I am doubting myself. They don’t serve me. I need to throw them out and stop allowing them to come back in. These thoughts take up space that the positive thoughts could inhabit.

Decluttering Tip #4: Sort and Organize Items

Home decluttering experts often tell us to sort items into piles, grouping similar items. Create categories and keep items that are similar together so you know where to find them. They suggest that you don’t skip a single item, no matter how insignificant you may think it is. This exercise helps you see how many items you really own and you’ll know exactly what to do with each item.

For example, you could organize your bathroom drawers into categories such as “medicine,” “beauty products” or “nail care.” However, you choose to organize, be sure to think about whether this streamlines your use of those items which is what you want to do ultimately to make your life easier.

The same can be said of sorting and organizing your thoughts. For example, if you are driving to work thinking about supper ingredients you haven’t put together yet, the materials you need to prep for your first lesson, you child’s soccer forms you haven’t filled out yet, and a million other things. Start sorting those thoughts. For example, the categories could be “things for work today”, “things to think about on the way home”, “things for the weekend” etc.  Then you can work through the most important first- like the “things for work today” on the way to work and put the others off until your drive home since you can’t do anything about them on the way to work anyway.

Paula: I make lists of my thoughts. If I am worried I am going to forget something I write it down or email it to myself. That way I don’t forget and can focus on the most pressing category of thoughts without the distractions of other categories. For example, yesterday I emailed myself a list of 3 things I needed to ask my husband to do. Once I emailed them, that category of things, I could focus on the category at hand.

Michele: I do this naturally with many different lists. It helps me to then do one list at a time.  This usually works, but it is dangerous if I have so many lists that my lists become overwhelming. One of my lists is always a top three things I must do today, and that has been very effective.

Decluttering Tip #5: Limit New Items. 

When you buy something new, try to get rid of something else.

 This decluttering advice is pretty self-explanatory. When you bring something new in, take something out. We don’t want to be hoarders. We can’t keep all the things or it can be overwhelming.

The same is true with our thoughts.

Decide which thoughts can have real estate in your brain and which can’t. Some thoughts just be let go when you bring a new thought in. They can’t all have space there.

Paula:  I went to the ATM to get cash and my PIN number was just gone. I kept bringing new thoughts in without getting rid of old ones, so my brain did the work for me. Unfortunately, my brain decided to get rid of my PIN number. I wish I would have made an intentional choice of the non-essential thought to get rid of.

Michele: Yikes! Your brain is deciding what to let go of. I haven’t done that. I have let go of things that I might regret someday. I no longer know anyone’s phone numbers. I don’t know birth dates either, unless it is on my calendar. I also stopped thinking about things on my husband’s lists or his to-do items. For whatever reason, I used to get things like his prescription refill notices.  I need to get that out of my brain. He can control that!

We hope that these decluttering tips are helpful. Maybe you’ve found one in particular that speaks to you.

We end with this quote by writer Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe:

“The things that matter most must never be at the mercy of things that matter least”

 Recap:

In this episode we explored how we can take 5 simple, common, home-decluttering strategies and apply them to decluttering our thoughts. By decluttering regularly, starting small, taking out the trash, sorting and organizing and limiting new items,  it will give us all more time to focus on the thoughts that really matter.

Quote:

“The things that matter most must never be at the mercy of things that matter least”

Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

Connect with the Inspired Together Teachers Community:

Download our FREE resource: The Inspired Teachers Guide to Taking Back Your Life.

Website: https:www.inspiredtogetherteachers.com

Instagram: Inspired-Together-Teachers

Facebook: Inspired Together Teachers

Inspired Together Teachers Network  Facebook Group

Linked In:  Inspired Together Learning

More About Inspired Together Teachers:

Are you a teacher struggling to balance your best work with your best life?

If you are dedicated and caring but often overwhelmed and exhausted, join us at Inspired Together Teachers. We’ll give you inspiration, strategies and tips that help you navigate life’s challenges as a stronger, more confident, and more joy filled person, both in and out of the classroom.

Inspired Together Teachers will give you practical tools to experience more of what matters most in your life.

Co-hosts Paula Schmidt and Michele Vosberg are award winning educators with the experience and skills to help teachers thrive in life and work. They’ve taught at all levels, worked with thousands of teachers, and conducted workshops around the world. They are also the authors of the #1 best-selling book The Inspired Teachers Journal: A Weekly Guide to Becoming Your Best Self.

Paula and Michele would love to have you to join them on their quest to lived inspired lives.

Living with Grace Ep. 88

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Living With Grace Season 6 Episode 88

hands sharing a flower, Living With Grace

Check out this episode to learn how to combat tension and divisiveness by living with grace for yourself and others. 

Show Notes: 

Episode Summary:

In this episode:

The following notes are key concepts from the episode, not a word for word transcript. We generally start with key points and then give examples and stories to illustrate the ideas. For the best experience, we recommend that you listen to the episode.

Introduction:

As this episode drops, it is just before the presidential election and our country, and the world in general seems extremely divisive. People are pitted against each other and anger and hurt are escalated. We are constantly surrounded by news and social media that allows fear and worry and shame to enter our daily thoughts.

People are hurting, and as a society we are recognizing the need to support mental health.

In this arena, there is support and comfort in living with grace. Stay tuned to today’s episode as we discuss living with grace.  Why do we need it?  What does it look like?  And most importantly, how can you level up your own life by choosing to live with grace.

What do we mean when we use the phrase “living with grace”?

When we talk about living with grace, we aren’t talking about being graceful, like a ballerina, though that might also be a worthy goal.

Living with grace is about choosing to be a better person.

It means showing kindness, or understanding or forgiveness.

It means having an open mind and being accepting of others’ beliefs and values.

Grace is a refinement- it is the absence of difficulty and instead feeling ease. It means making moments less serious, severe or difficult. Living with grace means being thoughtful, rather than overreacting. It means having common courtesy, which sometimes doesn’t seem all that common.

Michele: I remember a situation with a person who I had know for a long time but often struggled with.  I felt judged by her and didn’t think she really liked me. We had a large holiday party and she was there.  My daughter, who was four or five at the time, came running up to me crying and then proceeded to vomit all over everything- including herself, the floor, and the furniture. This person jumped in immediately and told me to go take care of my daughter and she would take care of everything. She’d find the paper towels and clean it all up. I was surprised by her kindness, and I remember it clearly to this day. I see that as an act of grace from one mom to another.

Paula: I think of grace in a teaching situation. We all know those students who it would be easy to be angry or upset with. But when we step back and look at them through a lens of understanding or kindness, that is giving them grace. They come in and they are angry or upset and if you feed into their anger you make them even more angry or upset.

When you say something like, “It sounds like you’re having a rough day. Can you tell me what’s going on, I’d love to be able to help,”  you’re showing grace to that student. We all know when we’ve said something like that, their whole demeanor can change. Sometimes we don’t give each other enough credit for giving grace to students. It can be difficult to give grace to others.

Let’s look at some ways we might work on living with grace.

Give yourself grace.

Sometimes, we hijack our own brains. We’re hard on ourselves and sometimes unforgiving.

That leads to a lot of personal doubt, the feelings that I’m not worthy enough, or I’m not good enough.

We tend to overemphasize our mistakes and let them drive our feelings about ourselves.

What would happen if we gave ourselves more grace?  We could forgive ourselves.

Recognize that what is over is done. You can’t go back, so you need to move forward.

Think of this through the lens of how you would treat a friend. Treat yourself like you would treat a friend. What would you tell a friend? You would speak kindly. We give grace to our friends. When they are in a rough time, we’d say things like, “It’s okay, you’re in a rough time, you’re doing the best you can at this time.”

How often do we talk to ourselves like that? Not often. That playlist in our mind to ourselves rarely  includes giving ourselves grace. If we added that into our internal conversation, wouldn’t that be wonderful? It is a goal for so many of us, we’ve thought about it, but we don’t think of it as giving ourselves grace. ” That’s okay. It’s alright. You’re doing the best you can.”

Why is it so hard for us to say that to ourselves?

It is like the well-known phrase from Maya Angelou, “Do the best you can until you know better.  Then, when you know better, you do better.”  That is the truth of it, you’re probably doing the best you can at the time.

Give yourself grace as you are learning and doing better.

Extend grace to others.

This one can be difficult. Sometimes it is easy to judge others. But you don’t know the whole story. You don’t know what they might be going through.

Paula: I was once working with a coach and having a difficult time with someone. The coach asked me, “What would change if you looked at it through the lens of someone who is…” and she proceeded to tell me the things this person was going through.

I immediately understood. She said, “Imagine extending that grace to her. Although she is not the best colleague, this is what she is going through in her life that makes her not her best.”

I think about that often. What if I assumed the best of her? Maybe she’s having a bad day because of what she is going through. People around us are struggling all the time, with an illness or a problem with a loved one- things that we don’t know.

What if I saw her through the lens of this?  My first thought is that I would give her grace. We need to extend grace to others.

What would be the worst thing that would happen if you always assume the best of others?

Michele: Sometimes I find it easy to take offense. If the clerk at the grocery store is rude to me, I feel it. I also assume it is about me, even though intellectually, I don’t even know that person and I know it isn’t about me. I have to remind myself to brush it off and let it go. I don’t know what is going on with her, but it is not about me.

Another way to live with grace is to respect diverse beliefs and perspectives.

Respect diverse beliefs and perspectives. 

There would be a lot fewer problems in the world if we could all learn to respect other people’s beliefs and perspectives. That also might mean being open to learning about them. We’re educators, we should be open to learning.

We tend to fear something we don’t understand. When we don’t know or understand something about someone else that seems strange or different to us it’s easy to be fearful of them.

Michele: I observed a group of Muslim men praying at the airport. A clock had started chiming, and their tradition is to pray five times a day by dropping to your knees while facing Mecca. They were very reverent.  I wish that everyone could observe acts such as these. It diminishes the fear and helps you see people in a fuller, more humanistic way.

The stereotype is that all Muslims are extremists and terrorists. You can pick them out from central casting displayed in almost every American movie about violence. If you don’t know anything about their lives or their culture, it is easy to be fearful of the unknown.

There is also a Muslim tradition to make the words “ God is good” the first words they speak to a new baby.

If people could see this kind of practice and understand it, they would not be afraid of someone just because they are Muslim.

Paula:  In Uganda, I had to learn to give people grace. I saw a little baby crawling in a village with no adult supervising. I was quick to judge. Where is the mother? How could a baby be crawling around without a mother? This was an example of  “It takes a village to raise a child.” Everyone needed to know that child in case something happened to the mother and she was not able to take care of it.

The mother was actually being a good mother by allowing her child to be independent and go out and seek others. In our culture here, if a baby was crawling around outside it would be very different. I had to give that mother grace. How difficult it must have been for her to let the baby go crawling around, knowing that it would find its way home or someone would turn it around towards home.

Wouldn’t the world be a better place, if we could all respect each other’s beliefs and perspectives? And then give a little grace once we’ve learned about it?

Try to see the good in the world.

There is certainly negativity and evil in the world. Bad things happen. News and social media feed the negativity.

It can be overwhelming, and if you let it, it can change your viewpoint towards the negative.

What if we believed that life is essentially good and that people are essentially good?

There would be less to worry about. There would be less fear.

We can choose to flip the script and assume that people is good and that life is good. As Mr. Rogers famously said, in any bad situation, “ look for the helpers.”  The helpers are the good in the world. That is an example of seeing the good in the world. There may be helpers out in the world but we miss them because we aren’t looking for them.

Michele:  I am currently loving a CBS Morning Segment called Kindness 101 with Steve Hartman and his children. It is available at CBS website or YouTube.  They find a story of someone who has done something kind and they explore that kindness. They interview the person and the kids ask questions. Now they have just rolled out an initiative for schools with lessons and materials. It always makes me feel good! I am also rewarded by knowing that there is good in the world.

Paula: I love the show what Would You Do? by John Quinones. People are put into a situation that is challenging. They don’t know it is a fake situation. For example, it might be a bakery and the clerk refuses to serve someone because of their race or gender. Then they stand by and watch what people will do. Often, people will step up and ask the person what they wanted to order and offer to order it.  Then they interview the people afterwards to find out why they chose to step in. So many times it is because they saw the injustice and wanted to make the world a better place.

I also remember learning about silver linings when I was taking a class for my Masters’ program and it has stuck with me. For every cloud, there is a silver lining and the silver lining is actually the beauty in the cloud. If you only look at the dark cloud, you will only see the dark cloud. If you see the silver lining, the shiny part, that is the good in the world. That’s the beauty, the bright spot peaking through.

Even in a bad situation there is a silver lining, that’s the beauty.

We’re not glossing over this and saying that everything is rosy all the time. We know that there are lots of issues and challenges in our world. But you can also see beyond them, or behind them, or in them see possibilities and opportunities to change things. That is the silver lining.

Yes, there is something bad, but I can step in, I can do something or I can say something. That’s hard. it takes a lot of courage but that is the silver lining, knowing that something can be better.

When a person is on the receiving side of grace, they are more likely to reciprocate.

We can do that in our world. We’re more powerful than we think.

Conclusion:

We end today with this quote from author and teacher Caroline Myss,

“Grace is a power that comes in and transforms a moment into something better.”

If you want to make the world better, make the moments better.

Recap:

Living with grace can help us to be kinder and better people and to impact the world in positive ways. You can start by giving yourself grace. You can also give grace to others. Grace is fueled when we respect others’ beliefs and perspectives, and when we try to see the good in the world.

Did you know that we have a free resource called The Inspired Teacher’s guide to Taking Back Your life?  Get it here. 

Quote:

“Do the best you can until you know better.  Then, when you know better, you do better.”

Maya Angelou

“Grace is a power that comes in and transforms a moment into something better.”

Caroline Myss

Connect with the Inspired Together Teachers Community:

Download our FREE resource: The Inspired Teachers Guide to Taking Back Your Life.

Website: https:www.inspiredtogetherteachers.com

Instagram: Inspired-Together-Teachers

Facebook: Inspired Together Teachers

Inspired Together Teachers Network  Facebook Group

Linked In:  Inspired Together Learning

More About Inspired Together Teachers:

Are you a teacher struggling to balance your best work with your best life?

If you are dedicated and caring but often overwhelmed and exhausted, join us at Inspired Together Teachers. We’ll give you inspiration, strategies and tips that help you navigate life’s challenges as a stronger, more confident, and more joy filled person, both in and out of the classroom.

Inspired Together Teachers will give you practical tools to experience more of what matters most in your life.

Co-hosts Paula Schmidt and Michele Vosberg are award winning educators with the experience and skills to help teachers thrive in life and work. They’ve taught at all levels, worked with thousands of teachers, and conducted workshops around the world. They are also the authors of the #1 best-selling book The Inspired Teachers Journal: A Weekly Guide to Becoming Your Best Self.

Paula and Michele would love to have you to join them on their quest to lived inspired lives.

 

Who Are You When You’re Teaching at Your Best? A Fun, Insightful Activity

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Who Are You When You’re Teaching at Your Best? A Fun, Insightful Activity

Season 6 Episode 87

teacher helping students with hands-on science, Who are You When You're Teaching At Your Best? A Fun, Insightful Activity

Listen to this episode to learn a fun, quick strategy that will give you insight to who you are when you are teaching at your best!

Show Notes:

Episode Summary:

Who are you when you’re teaching at your best?

Today’s episode is an exploration of who we are as teachers, and what this means for our lives in and out of the classroom. Together we will complete an activity that is inspired by an exercise from the book, The Courage to Teach, by one of our favorite educators of all time, Parker Palmer.

We’re sharing a fun and reflective activity what will get you diving deep into who you are as a teacher.

You might laugh, you might cry, but at the very minimum we guarantee that 20 minutes from now, you will see yourself as a teacher and a person in a whole new way… and we will have some fun in the process.

In this episode:

The following show notes are a summary of key points in the episode.  To get all of the examples and stories we share, listen to the podcast.

Introduction:

If you have listened to any of our podcast episodes, you know we love talking about teaching. We especially like talking about teaching when we can make connections between who we are as teachers and who we are in our lives outside of school…. because there are definitely connections. Today, we are going to share with you an activity what we love to facilitate because, besides being fun, it is insightful into who we are as teachers and as people.

First, we need to give credit where credit is due. Several years ago, we read about this activity in the book The Courage to Teach by Parker Palmer. Even though this activity was only talked about in 2 and a half pages of the 200 page book, we loved it so much that we took his premise, changed it up a bit, and expanded upon it.

So without further delay, let’s get started.

First, here is what you don’t need- You don’t need a pen or paper. You don’t need self-doubt or judgement. There is no room for any of that in this activity.

You do need- to come into this activity with an open mind and an honest heart. We will both share our examples with you, and we will share the examples of two teachers who completed this activity with us in the past, just to give you context. We will call them Becky and Charlie. Your responses will be different than any of us, they will be unique to you. That is part of what makes this so fun and insightful.

This activity involves a series of questions about who you are as a teacher but as you will see, you will learn about yourself as well.

Question #1- How would you complete this sentence? 

Say the first thing that comes to your mind to complete this sentence. Don’t overthink. Just answer.

“When I am teaching at my best, I am like a _____________________.”

Because this idea was inspired by Parker Palmer, we will share his metaphor first and then share our examples. Parker said, “When I am teaching at my best, I am like a sheepdog- not the large, shaggy, lovable kind, but the all-business Border collies one sees working the flocks in sheep country.“ He goes on to say that sheep dogs maintain the space for the sheep to graze, holds them together and brings back strays, protects them and moves them to other places when the grazing ground is depleted. He feels he does that when he is teaching at his best.

Paula: When I am teaching at my best, I am like a great hostess at a gathering of friends. I am the “Hostess with the mostest.” The great hostess weaves through the crowd flowing in and out of conversations, making sure people are getting out of the party what they came for, making sure the environment and conversation are engaging, creating a safe place with all the amenities to make it a charged environment that no one wants to leave when it is over. That is exactly what I feel like when I am teaching at my best.

Michele: When I am teaching at my best I am like an interior designer. I make the environment warm and welcoming and a good place for learning. People will feel comfortable and safe, and know that they are welcomed and that they will be heard. My space could be beautiful, but it also functions well, with room for all kinds of activities.  It’s is fun and pleasant but if I’ve done it well, you don’t necessarily notice all the elements in the room but it somehow works well for you. It meets the needs and activities of the people who are there.

Here are some examples of teachers we worked with:

Charles: Charles is one of our favorite teachers on this planet. He said, “When I am teaching at my best,   I am like a unicorn, I make the classroom a magical place.” We just want to add that we have seen Charles teach and it really is like watching magic.

Another teacher we worked with is Becky. Becky said, “When I am teaching at my best, I am like a tour guide. I am leading my students on a journey. I  am guiding them through an amazing tour of all of their learning”.

So what is your metaphor?  When I am teaching at my best I am like a ….

Once you have this question answered you are ready to move on to the next questions. However, if you have not answered this question yet, do not move on yet because the rest of the activity is based on your answer to this.

Question #2- What are the “strengths” you have related to this metaphor?

Now, list the strengths of the metaphor you listed. Don’t be humble here. Be honest. You chose your metaphor for a reason. Let’s say you said, “When I am teaching at my best I am like a rainbow” then start listing your favorite things about a rainbow (colorful, hopeful, awe-inspiring, bright). If they match you, own those verbs, adverbs, or adjectives with pride.

Paula: Because it is easy to Google “the strengths of a good hostess” I did and here is what I got- The strengths of a good hostess that mirror my strengths- friendly, personable, welcoming, outgoing, confident, composed, team spirit, willing to learn, and sets a positive tone. The crazy thing about this is that I have kept a note on my desk for my WHOLE teaching career, and I still have it there that says, “I set the tone” and tone setting is literally one of the top ten things I read about good hostesses when I did an online search. I know I picked a good metaphor.

Michele: Paula, that is amazing. I have seen those sticky notes in various colors in your office through the years. The traits of an interior designer I selected are creating a calm, welcoming, safe, comfortable, space.  A good interior designer also knows to understand the people and who will be in the space and what they need to be comfortable.

In the example of our teacher friend who is a Unicorn, he is magical and captivating, full of personality and rare as teachers go, which he is! Our tour guide teacher, Becky, is charismatic, genuine, energetic all words to describe a tour guide.

Now take a second to think of your strengths that align to your metaphor.

Question #3- What are the “Bright Spots” that happen in your classroom related to this metaphor?

Think of specific bright spots that have happened in your classroom in the past related to your metaphor. They may be general feelings or specific events that have brightened your day.

For example, we said Charles is like a unicorn when he is teaching at his best. He does unique activities that other teachers may be too afraid to do. He dresses up. He sings. The students are totally under his spell like a magical power that he has over them. The parents of his students talk about how their elementary students love him, which is a magical thing. Every day he walks into the classroom dressed up as another historical figure, he has created magical learning that will never be forgotten.

That is not for everyone.  Not all of us can be magical. We don’t all dress up as characters, that is his gift.

Becky talked about how she, as a tour guide when she was teaching at her best, could expose her students to information they would never have had exposure to. As a world traveler herself, she brought back artifacts from around the world that students could hold in their hands to experience foreign places in ways that could never be replicated with just a book. She animatedly told them about people and places that they then aspired to learn about.

A good teacher does help to open up the world to students, helping them understand other people, places, and experiences they have never had. Both of these teachers are great teachers. They are also different from each other but they are teaching with their gifts.

Paula: When I am like a hostess, I know that students feel comfortable in my classroom. I make sure there is a sense of community, making sure everyone has a chance to talk to different people and hear different perspectives, just like a hostess would make sure people were doing at her party.

I welcome my students with excitement and truly enjoy their presence which students will tell me years later that they appreciated about me and my classroom. They tell me years later, “We always thought you loved teaching our class. ”  That is because I did. They also tell me, ” We felt that you loved us as individuals,” and that’s because I do.

Michele: That is who you are as a teacher. This is not a stretch to say these things, it is who are you. In my interior designer magical home or bright spots, I think of the people who will be in the space and the exquisite conversations that will take place there. I love setting up the right chairs, a fire in the fireplace,scented candles, maybe some soft music and in my home, often with a glass of wine.

Everyone is engaged in the conversation, they are listening and sometimes even arguing. They are all wrapped up in the discussion and it goes on and on, until someone says, “oh look at the time, we have to get going!”  No one wants it to end.

I love it when that happens in a classroom and you have those exquisite conversations. You are walking towards the hallway after class and everyone is still talking. Those are the golden moments for me.”

Isn’t it amazing how each of our unique teaching and personal characteristic are already clear in just these few questions based off our metaphors?

We could expand upon our bright spots for sure, but we will keep it short for the sake of this podcast. Now think about yourself. Take time to pause this if you need to. List bright spots that happen in your classroom related to your metaphor.  You can dive as deep into this as you want. You can keep your list short like we did, or sit and think on it for a long time. The longer you think, the more bright spots you will come up with and you will think of many if you give yourself the time.

You will also get the warm and fuzzy feeling as you bask in these good memories.

Question #4- What are the “Shadows” of your metaphor that may apply to you?

While it is fun to look at the bright spots, we also need to explore the not so wonderful traits. Parker Palmer calls them the “shadows” of your metaphor.

What are the potentially negative parts of your metaphor? Google if you want or just list them from your memory or experiences.

Paula: For example, hostesses can get way to pre-occupied with details and forget the real reason they are there, for the people. I do that for sure. They can become indifferent to the needs of their guest if they decide they need to stick too closely to a predetermined party plan or get to focused on the logistics. I can  work on that.

Our unicorn teacher friend worried that other teachers might not take him seriously, that unicorns are often perceived as fun but unrealistic. Unicorns are also seen as a fantasy vs being the real thing and he wanted to be taken seriously as a teacher because he really knew how to teach.

Charles is a really phenomenal teacher. He has serious teaching skills and content knowledge, and he also does things in a playful way. We’ve all know those teachers who are all flash and no substance. He didn’t want that.

Michele: My shadow is that interior design might feel very superficial. I know a lot of people couldn’t care less about how their environment looks. They don’t pay attention to how it feels. Some people think I am obsessed, then they turn around and ask me to help with their house!

I also worry about being thought of as all flash and no substance. If you pay attention though, there is substance and function. There are reasons for why things are the way they are. It is about how the space makes you feel and how it helps you to understand yourself and how you are in the world. It’s actually pretty deep.

Parker Palmer noticed the irony in his “sheepdog” metaphor, that he could potentially just see his students as sheep who follow and not notice them as individuals.

What are the shadows of your metaphor? This isn’t meant to make you feel bad. It is meant to draw awareness.

Question 5#- What are the “Darker Spots” that happen in your classroom related to this metaphor?

Think about how the shadows of the metaphor could play out in your classroom, causing darker spots in the day or the environment. Like the bright spots you may be able to come up with generalizations or specific instances of darker spots in your classroom related to your metaphor.

Michele: For me, it is when someone doesn’t connect to my environment. I have failed to bring them into my world, my environment didn’t work for them.

Paula: Like a good party planner, I like to plan. When I come up with a great plan or activity, I am excited to see how it plays out in the classroom. If it starts to bomb, I go into full “hostess mode” trying to make it all right again, trying to salvage it so everyone is still happy and engaged. Because of this, I can leave a bad lesson feeling worse than other teachers who might be able to shrug it off. For me it can feel like I personally failed to plan and implement the plan right.

Our tour guide friend mentioned tour guides already know the material so they want to move on to the next thing and get bored easily, even when the people on the tour aren’t always ready to move on. She mentioned that she can get impatient when there are one or two students who aren’t ready to move on with her and the class to the next topic. She worried that students could sense her impatience.

What are the darker spots that happen in your classroom related to your metaphor? Again, this is not meant to make you feel bad, but instead to increase your awareness so you can be on the lookout for it in the future.

Question #6- How does this metaphor play out in other areas of your life?

This is an interesting concept. We regularly talk about “Work Life. Home Life. Best Life.” So many of the things that we discover about ourselves as teachers can help us in our home life, and vice versa.

What does your metaphor tell you about who you are outside of work?

What about our tour guide teacher, Becky.  No matter the situation she lead those around her on a journey….and people follow. It is her gift and it can work no matter the life situation.

Paula: I love to act as the hostess in a group. I can do well in a crowd of people I don’t know and like to introduce people so no one feels left out. That plays out in my life as I attend my husband’s work events when he is more introverted, it is the reason my children’s friends feel so welcome at my house.

Michele: I have the same example. My house is the one everyone wants to come to. I have the baby showers and graduations.  All the kids hung out at my house. People feel comfortable there.

How well does your metaphor align with other areas of your life? We are guessing it does. What examples can you think of?

Question #7- How can your metaphor strengthen you and make you more resilient?

Palmer suggests that the guidance you need in tough times can be found in your metaphor.

For example, when Charles is struggling at school or at work, he could ask himself, “What would a unicorn do in this situation?” Probably spread the magic! And that is a quality that he could use no matter where he is in his life.

What about our tour guide teacher, Becky, no matter the situation she lead those around her on a journey….and people follow. It is her gift and she can call on it to work no matter the life situation.

Paula: My hostess comes in to help me be more resilient. I have a friend who just passed away from cancer and yesterday I sent her college aged daughter a Venmo with a message to get a coffee on me, that I loved her and to have a good day. My only goal was to brighten her day and to make sure she felt noticed and loved. It’s what a hostess does. A few days before her mom passed, I told her mom not to worry, that she would be well looked after. It was the same thing I said when that little girl was dropped off at slumber parties we hosted at our house as an early elementary schooler, and when she got dropped of at our house for the get-ready-for-prom-girl-gatherings, all of which I loved to host at our house.  I am glad to still be able to look out for her from afar and set a tone for her day. It helps me to be more resilient and helps with loss.

Michele:  When I thought of this one, yes, interior designers can make a room special, but I can also make people feel valued and special. I know I have achieved that when I have very long standing relationships for many, many years. People who have been out of my life, such as students from my early  years, have come back into my life.  They’ll tell me, ” you always noticed me, you always made me feel special, like I belonged.”  That’s the bigger picture I can take away from creating spaces.

There are so many different questions you could ask yourself to expand upon your metaphor. We hope you explore a few.

In his book, Parker Palmer suggests to do this activity with colleagues you feel confident with. He suggests, “…the pay-off in self-understanding can be considerable.” We agree. So grab a friend and a cup of coffee. Sit down and explore your “Teaching at my Best” metaphors together. It will one of your vest conversations!

Recap:

The “Teaching at Your Best” activity helped us to explore who we are as teachers. It is important to remember that our teaching metaphors also have implications for our lives out of the classroom. Even though it started as a fun little game, a simple metaphor, you likely saw yourself as a teacher, and a person, in a whole new way.

If you would like more help in living with intention, check out our book, The Inspired Teachers Journal: A Weekly Guide to Becoming Your Best Self. We set you up with some insight and then give you journal prompts and amazing advice from other teachers who are on a journey to live their inspired lives. 

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Are you a teacher struggling to balance your best work with your best life?

If you are dedicated and caring but often overwhelmed and exhausted, join us at Inspired Together Teachers. We’ll give you inspiration, strategies and tips that help you navigate life’s challenges as a stronger, more confident, and more joy filled person, both in and out of the classroom.

Inspired Together Teachers will give you practical tools to experience more of what matters most in your life.

Co-hosts Paula Schmidt and Michele Vosberg are award winning educators with the experience and skills to help teachers thrive in life and work. They’ve taught at all levels, worked with thousands of teachers, and conducted workshops around the world. They are also the authors of the #1 best-selling book The Inspired Teachers Journal: A Weekly Guide to Becoming Your Best Self.

Paula and Michele would love to have you to join them on their quest to lived inspired lives.

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